Martha Stewart, "on ice".
Date: Thursday, September 23, 2004 5:28 PM
Poor Martha Stewart! Gimme' a break, will ya'? Every time I hear
MarthaStewart's name and prison mentioned in tha' same
breath, I jus' wanta' let out a giant, "Oh Pshaw!" So much
horse pucky. Don't fret boyz and gurlz and all you Martha fans out
there...cuz Martha's not goin' anywhere NEAR an actual prison!
No, no, Martha is jus' goin' off to spend five months in a dormitory,
much like a college dorm, except without as much rules and supervision.
Cuz ya' see, Martha is an Adult y'know, and therefore doesn't need
ta' be watched as closely as like, say, a horny young college soph
who's constantly tryin' ta' sneak her date upstairs.
Of course, after Martha's pulled that five months of hard time
Ha ha; it's not over fer her, cuz she'll still owe them five months
of home detention. Shudder! Gasp! Can ya' even begin ta'
imagine tha' Horror of bein' confined in one of Martha's Mansions
fer five whole months.
Recognising the inconvenience of it all to Martha, tha' government
is allowing her ta' choose which one of her estates she's gonna' be
confined in. A pox on tha' head of those scurrilous bastards who say
this government is mean-spirited, evil and wicked. How then explain
Well, let's jus' hope that Martha finds some help while she's inside
and is completely Rehabilitated when it's all over and doesn't become
jus' another stat like so many others who go thru tha' Revolving Door
of tha' System.
Personally, I think she is an excellent candidate fer Rehabilitation
and I think when all is said and done, she will put it all behind
her, move on, and once again become a productive member of Society.
I recall hearin' Martha say jus' a short time ago that those folks
who have supported her in tha' past can demonstrate their continuing
support by continuing to buy lots and lots of her stuff. So if You
would like to show yer support fer Martha, go out tomorrow and max
out yer credit card on Martha Stewart products. She'll be glad ya
did...and ya'll feel better bout yer own damn bad self too!
Meanwhile, tho, I'm wonderin' jus' who tha' fuck is gonna show me
how to build a treehouse outta' used toothpicks? Huh? Who? Yikes!
We're gonna miss ya', Martha! tha cap'm
Those Agri-business Fiends
Date: Sunday, September 19, 2004 11:50 PM
I wuz to tha' Price Chopper grocery store earlier this evenin' and
they had some AE 2% chocolate milk there fer 99 cents a quart. Right
next to it, they had some AE 2 % chocolate milk in a half-gallon carton
fer 2.09 cents.
I thought, "hmmm" so I did some mental cipherin'' (dig this.
I did this all without a calculator, or even pen and paper. ya'd be
surprised at how many youth find this astonishin'!) and I multiplied
2 times .99 and came up with 1.98 cents fer a half gallon and wuz
wonderin', based on these calculations, why in tha' fuck would anybody
buy a half-gallon carton and pay .11 cents more, than fer two quart
cartons, which if I'm not mistaken is also a half-gallon? Somebody
at Price Chopper Headquarters needs ta' re-examine their pricin' strategies,
don'cha think? So, I went with tha' two quart plan, but wuz watchin'
my back on tha way out, cuz somethin' jus' jus' didn't seem right!
I also bought a small container of Land-O-Lakes vegetable oil. When
I got back ta' tha' crib I read on tha' back of tha' tub that it,
*can be used successfully in heating and baking.
Whoa jack! Now, frankly, before I read that, I really hadn't thought
much about it, but now, I wonder? Are they jus' jivin' us or whut?
I mean, they say it can be used 'successfully', but why would they
say that in tha' first place unless...I mean, whut happens if it's
not successful? Is there any danger of explosion or anythin'? Whut
are tha' risks? They're not jus' vague; they don't even address tha'
issue. I'm not paranoid or anythin' but ya' cain't be too careful
these days, ya' know whut ah'm sayin'! tha' cap't
P.S. After tha' weekly Chief's debacle, in an interview, Tony Richardson
was babblin' on and on bout how tha' team wuz gonna have to ask tha'
Lords help ta' overcome their adversity. Sheeit. Sheeit. and
double sheeit. Like God gives a shit bout tha' fortunes of tha' Kansas
City Chiefs! Whut with all tha' beseechins' of hurricane victims and
ethnic strife and wars and famine with millions of starvin' peoples
all over tha' world, he's gonna' take time outta' his busy schezhule
to help a football team? Yeah sure!! Fuckin' A! I think he'll listen.
Ya' know, when teams lose, peoples start askin' lotsa' questions bout
their 'character'. They say...now they're gonna' find out whether
they got any 'character' or not? Does it ever occur to them that tha'
reason why they lose is not cuz god has given up on them, or cuz they
lack character; maybe it's as simple as..... they're jus' no fuckin'
good! Oh no. not that. Nooooo. There's jus gotta be some other reason!
Date: Friday, September 17, 2004 5:35 PM
Just in case you missed my last message, my son's band is not playin
at Mike's (on Troost, up from Rockhurst) tonight as I origially told
ya' due to a shezhuling mix-up...HOWEVER... this weekend Mike's are
having their 40th year anniversary, Friday, Saturday and Sunday, so
if ya' haven't been in fer a while, ya' might see some old amigoes
from days gone by. the capt.
P.S. And if yer outta state, it's not too late ta' get in touch with
Johnny Greyhound. He''ll make sure ya' get here on time.
Eureaka!! Another breakthrough!
Date: Thursday, September 16, 2004 4:21 PM
Zounds! I did it again. I wuz in my kitchen/lab earlier, trying to
recreate some of the stuff I wrote ya' about recently, "tha'
This time however I used a different brand of feta cheese and a different
brand of salsa and a different brand of Ranch dressing and some different
seasonings. Since I didn't measure out my ingredients tha' first time,
there wuz some variation in proportions.
As a result, what emerged wuz a product totally different from the
first concoction. This batch tastes exactly like tuna fish! Thas'
right, Tuna fish! Whut I have done, in effect, is, usin' only about
seven dollars worth of ingredients, I have successfully reproduced
a 59 cent can of tuna! Ha ha. I mean, where will it all end ya'll?
This is jus' one more step, albeit, a huge one, in my march to tha'
Culinary Hall of Fame, wouldn't ya' think? Chef Hoohah
Sports Cliches, ad nauseum
September 13, 2004 4:47 PM
Las' night, watchin' the' Chief's debacle, I heard tha' expression,
or variation of it, "shoot themselves in tha' foot", not
once, not twice, but THREE TIMES!! Makes me wonder jus' whut their
foots musta' looked like after such a fusillade?
I wonder, is there a sports announcer ANYWHERE in this country who
is capable of announcing an entire game (any kinda' game) without
sayin' this most trite worn out of trie worn out expressions? ANYWHERE?
Or else, how bout' "bein' on tha' same page."?
You'd think these peoples could come up with some way of expressin'
these thoughts without havin' ta' use tha' same expression everyone
else uses, week in and week out thru tha' whole season, wouldn't ya'?
I mean they've been sayin' that shit fer years and years. And could
some one please eliminate Queen's "We will....We will....WE WILL
ROCK YA'!!" Ban
it fer at least a generation. Please!! It shouldn't be all that hard.
All they gotta' do is get out there and "Execute Better!"
Hey, "No question about it", these peoples are "arguably"
a buncha' FUCKIN' IDIOTS. tha cap'm
The' Cap'm remembers an Early mornin' Repast
Date: Saturday, September 11, 2004 3:06 AM
Ya' know, earlier today I wuz havin' a baked potato and I wuz using
some of my own specially designed salsa on it, and here, I would jus'
like to reply to that person whose one word response to my recipe
was "Ugh", I can only say that,
"You Sir, are a twit!"
Well anyway, I added a some black pepper for a little extra nuance
of flavor and also because I Always add black pepper to just about
everything I eat. And also olives too. These are both good with jus'
So...as I was sprinklin' tha' black pepper on my potato, it triggered
a memory of an incident that occured a while back. It happened like
this. I wuz in this all nite diner havin' ordered some pancakes. When
tha' waitress set them on the table, I asked her if I could get a
side of olives. She found this amusin'. I said. "No, really,
could I have some olives?"
She said they were unavailable with breakfast and while we were having
this conversation, I wuz in the midst of preparin' my pancakes by
applyin' tha' syrup, and then I started adding tha' salt and pepper.
When she saw me puttin' the pepper on, she giggled and said, "What
are you doing?" teehee
I said. "Well, I'm not playin' hop-scotch sweetie! I mean, whut
does it look like I'm doin'?"
She said, "Well I've just never seen anyone put pepper on their
And I was getting a little exasperated so I said, kinda sarcastic-like,
"Yeah, I cn' brelieve that. And ya've prolly never eaten Chihuahua
Chili before either, have ya'?"
She wasn't quite sure she heard me correctly, I guess, cuz' she said,
"I dunno, what goes in it?"
"Well, Chihuahua! For one" I replied.
Again, she seemed a bit bewildered, "You mean, like a little
"Tha's right!" I said, "Now yer catching on!"
And she rolled hey eyes and gave me what you would call a strange
look suppose, and said, "Enjoy your meal" and went away,
and after that, I didn't get much by way of attentive service. Any
more. At all. Tsk, tsk. Some pipples jes' have no sense of adventure
about them huh!
By the bye, in the Nov. 89 issue of OMNI magazine, should
ya' happen ta' have one layin' aroun', the well known Pet Gourmet,
Russell Jones, shares his recipe for Chihuahua Chili. Should ya' be
entertainin' friends and are looking for that special dish, I will
be glad to send you his recipe. Chef Jones warns however, that:
"A Chihuahua will try everything from putting it's tail betwwen
it's legs and shivering, to staring you down with large, oil-puddle
eyes. But fight back the tears. Remember...a chef's gotta do what
a chef's gotta do!"
Sound advice indeed eh? Gut appetité, tha' Cap'm.
A World without Cliches
Date: Saturday, September 11, 2004 1:45 AM
(Although I wrote this six years ago, it still seems rather pertinent)
Omigod, as you might have guessed, I am about to play the Cliche Card
here. Hello! Helloooo?! Is anybody home? I mean, are we on the same
page here, or what? Well, there's no question about it, I may be shooting
myself in the foot here, and argueably, this will no doubt come back
to haunt me, but, I think that if you're going to talk the talk, then,
you gotta walk the walk too. Am I right or am I wrong?
I know, I know, you're saying, Don't go there! Don't EVEN go there.
But hey, Gimme a break! This is not rocket science here, so get a
Life, huh! We're not talking about Weapons of Mass Destruction; we're
not even talking about some extra-curricular activities on the gridiron,
we're simply trying to eliminate the tired, worn out phrases we are
bombarded with every day. Bingo! You got it. Just some simple fucking
Closure, that's all......
Some closure on the Cliche, and after that, it's Katy, bar the door.
Every Jack and Jill around is looking for some closure, so, why can't
I get some too? You know what ahm sayin'? The next time you hear someone
about you using a cliche, poke them in the eye! Big Time!! with a
sharp stick! You know what ahm' sayin'?! Carry you a sharp stick every
place you go and when some yahoo approaches you and says, "Yo,
whas' up?" Well...duh! You know the procedure!
El Capitano, the red pen armed, sharp stick in the hand Cliche Crusader
P.S. For those of you, who upon reflection, find you may have been
guilty of this in the past, for verily, who amongst us hasn't succumbed
to the insidious and pernicious lure of the cliche at some time or
another, just remember...that Tomorrow is the first day of the rest
of your Life. Maybe that'll help you. And if not...consider this...
A mind is a terrible thing to misplace! Duh!
A bit more music trivia
Date: Friday, September 10, 2004 5:21 PM
Remember Booker T and the MGs who did "Green Onion" back
in 1962? Well the MGs were the back up band on Otis Redding's "Sittin'
on tha' Dock of tha' Bay". Tha' whistlin' part of tha' song wuz
just something Redding did as a fill in until he could
come up with some lyrics. But he wuz killed three days later in an
air plane crash. So, tha' whistlin' stayed and became an integral
part of tha' song, albeit, unintentionally.
They also played on Rufus Thomas. "Walkin' tha' dog."
We all know Glenn Campbell useta' be lead guitar fer th' Beach Boys,
and that Waylon Jenings wuz in Buddy Holly's band an wuz supposed
to have been on tha' plane tha' day tha' music died, but gave up his
seat to tha' Big Bopper I believe. One of 'em anyway. tha' cap'm
Peoples who won't take Responsibility? Whus' up wit dat?
Date: Wednesday, September 8, 2004 5:32 PM
It wuz one of those nights! A short time ago I came home drom my
wanderings and decided to fix myself some victuals, as I am often
wont to do early of a morn. Perhaps I shouldn't have done this, but
as our Country 'brothas' would say, "I wuz Hongry!"
"Whut wuz I thinkin'?" ya' say? Well I wuzn't thinkn', at
least clearly, thru no fault of my own I might add.
My misadventure started when I attempted to remove a large pot of
previously prepared rice from tha' ice box, (also known as a refrigerator)
when everything went horribly wrong! It happened so fast I don't even
know how it happened. Ya' know how that shit goes; everything is goin'
jus' fine and then...BAM...all of a sudden, tha' world is upside down,
and ya don't have any idea how it got that way? Somehow, inexplicably,
I wound up with this cauldron of rice all over the kitchen floor.
It wuz rice here, rice there, oh mcdonald, there was fucking rice
"Oh shit", I exclaimed!
My first thought wuz, "Whut the fuck am I gonna' eat now?"
And while I wuz contemplatin' that, plus trying to figure out how
to deal with the mess, I wuz so distracted and so heavy into thought
that I completely forgot to maintain my balance, (admittedly not an
unusual occurrence) and found myself careenin' over backwards landin'
on the open door of my dishwasher, mashin' it all the way to the floor.
This is a position it wuzn't originally designed to execute.
I clumsily rolled over on to my hands and knees, and managed to obtain
a mostly perpendicular stance usin' the wall as an aid from which
to observe the damage.
Sheeit. The fuckin' door wouldn't close now. Now I gotta' deal with
Fortunately, the utility closet wuz only steps away and I jes' happened
to have a dishwasher door closing implement' there. (sometimes known
as a hammer) Unfortunately fer me, as I tried ta' make
my way to tha' closet I had ta' leave tha' stabilizin' influence of
tha' wall and cuz of tha' slick rice all over tha' floor...WHOOMP
I went again.
I said, or words to that effect. Luckily, I fell in tha' direction
I wuz headin' and wuz able to use tha' doorknob of tha' closet door
ta' get upright again. After I got tha' hammer, I decided not ta'
take any chances on tha' return trip and so I crawled back to tha'
dishwasher, and from a kneelin' position, after nine or ten heavy-duty
whacks, I managed to get it closed and locked into place. I'm hopin'
my landlord, who lives upstairs doesn't get too inquisitive as to
why I'm hammerin' at 4 of the AM.
Now, I still gotta' take care of tha' rice situation I had no way
of dealing with it at all, cuz the last time I moved I purposely left
my shovel behind. I had gotten tired of luggin' it around from place
to place for years, on the off chance I might need it someday to bury
somethin' in the backyard.
Now, here I am with a mountain of rice and no shovel to work with.
Ya' might say, to use the old cliche, that I wuz "up shit-creek
without a shovel". (hmmmm, that don't make a whole lotta' sense
does it?) Well, it's kinda' moot since I never woulda' been able ta'
operate tha' fuckin' thing anyway!
As I knelt there, tryin' to figure out my next move, in a moment of
rare clarity, I decided that maybe I should jes' forego the whole
project fer the moment and try and deal with it on the morrow, cuz
I really couldn't handle it at the time. So, I hadda' launch myself
about five feet thru open space to the' doorway, which I managed to
grab and hang onto. From there I used tha' hall wall to make my way
to tha' bedroom and tha' sweet embrace of tha' Sleep Fairy.
Tha' next day when I staggered into tha' kitchen I wuz shocked ta'
see tha' mess there and I thought ta' myself, "Dahym! Whut happened
here? Who's responsible fer this shit? Not me.
Uhuh. Nope. I'm not takin' tha' rap on this one. This belongs ta'
RESPONSIBILITY, see. It's time peoples started accepting Responsibility
for their Irresponsible ways, bein' held accountable, y'know whut
I mean! I'm sick and tired of these slackers always tryin' ta' put
their shit on some one else, like Me fr'instance....so, I'm gonna'
sue the manufacturer of that pot with it's shoddily designed and ill
manufactured handle. There is an obvious design flaw there, otherwise
I never woulda' dropped it in tha' first place, would I? They need
to accept Responsibility!
Aw'right, those assholes who manufactured the dishwasher gadget. Jes'
how fuckin' hard would it be for them to install an air bag on that
door, huh? Y'know, if they can send a man to the moon, why can't they
put an air bag on the dishwasher door? Tha' answer is; they could
if they wanted! If nothing else they could at least pad the damn thing
so as to minimize injuries to consumers such as myself who happen
to occasionally fall on their godammed appliance. Obviously Consumer
Safety is not high on their list of priorities, is it? No, no, they
jes' wanta' make those big-time bucks, thas all. but hey ese, it's
time for them to accept Responsibility.
OK, even though the bartender where I imbibed earlier in the evening
is a friend of mine, it is blatantly apparent that he over-served
me. Fr'instance, witness my crashing about my kitchen, unable to maintain
my perpendicularity. Twice! One doesn't fall on their head for no
apparent reason, do they? Tha' answer to this one is NO! It's time
he accepts Responsibility.
Now then, there is tha' owner of tha' joint, who also happens to be
a friend of mine. However, he needs to be sued for showing bad judgement
in the hiring of his personnel. He needs ta' accept Responsibility.
And whut about those peoples who make that Bud? I'm talkin' Anheuser-Busch
Brewing Co... said product of which I wuz allowed ta' consume too
much, thus causin' my internal gyros to malfunction. They need ta'
accept Responsibility. There is no warning on those bottles sayin',
"Warning..Warning.. The Surgeon General advises that excessive
use of this product may cause one to drop their rice and fall on the
Oh sure, there's a caution there about pregnant women and driving
vehicles, but whut tha' fuck has that got ta' do with me at 4 in the
morning? Nada amigos. Nada fuckin' thing! They need to take Responsibility.
And I know I might be stretching it here a bit, but it may not be
too far fetched ta' connect the makers of the Uncle Ben product to
this debacle. They could do somethin', maybe a simple warning such
as, "Warning..Warning.. the Surgeon General advises against the
use of this product in conjunction with irresponsible manufacturers
of badly designed pots and appliances while under the influence of
beverages sold by irresponsible brewers served by irresponsible bartenders,
hired by irresponsible owners", or
y'know, something to
Course, I have no doubt that every one of these entities would deny
any culpability whatsoever, all of 'em would prolly try and lay that
shit on me...makin' me tha' 'fall guy', and ther's no question that
I wuz in fact tha' fall guy, haha but that wuzn't my fault, wuz it!
No, no, It wuz those Other peoples who were ta' blame...but they jus'
don't wanta' accept Responsibility for their irresponsible ways!!
Whut tha' fuck is with peoples anyway? I jes' don't get it! the capt.
Note from reader Ombudsman Joe Dreck
Date: Tuesday, September 7, 2004 1:55 PM
While the cap't sarcastically writes about city counsel person McFadden-Weaver's
erroneously attributing a remark Geo.Bush made to John Kerry, he then,apparentl
with his head up his ass goes ahead to refer to her
as CYNTHI when in fact her first name is SAUNDRA.
Whas' up with that? How hard would it be to get her first name correct?
Some peoples in their glass houses huh! Joe Dreck
Date: Sunday, September 5, 2004 8:51 PM
In response to constituents in her district who are seekin' to have
a petition to recall her because of their dissatisfaction with her
performance, City Councilwoman Mcfadden-Weaver responded by sayin'
and I quote,
"In the words of John Kerry and the writer of the song. BRING
Ha ha. Ya' remember when Kerry issued that challenge, don'cha? And
this same Mcfadden-Weaver, jus' recently, in an interview about the
discovery of several bodies found in her district as a possible result
of a serial killer, also made the observation, commenting on the blight
in her district,
"Criminals like to hide!"
Whooo! Remember that bit of enlightenment boyz and gurlz. Man, this
is one smart cookie here huh!!!
Hey, this has got nothin' ta' do with politics but whut's tha' deal
with some guyz anyway when it comes ta' goin' to tha' bathroom? They
always amuse me when they say,
"Scuse me, I got to go pee."
I'm thinkin'...well scuuse me, but ya' gotta go..."pee"?
Sheeit, in tha' first place, ya' don't gotta' make a public announcement
'bout it to begin with, ha ha, but if ya' feel ya' must, whus' up
with that "pee" bidness anyway? Yer an adult now. Ya' can
be a bit more direct 'bout it! I mean, gurlz have'ta "pee",
and maybe, like, 9 or 10 year old boyz may still "pee",
but 31 year old guyz who are 6' 4", and weigh 245 should be takin'
a "leak" or a "piss" or if they're sensitive bout
it, "use tha' bathroom", y'know, somthin' like that....
ya' know whut I mean, and leave tha' "peein" to those delicate
folks I jus' mentioned. tha' cap'm
P.S. I heard Garrison Keilor say today on tha' Prairie Home Companion,
"I hate people who talk on their cell phones in public. If God
had meant for people to have loud, obnoxious, one-sided conversations
in public he would have made them a Crazy Person!"
Right on Mr. Keilor, I couldn't agree more!! Last night, or rather
early this morning, around 3:45, I, along with all the other peoples
on my block were privy to this teenage Drama Queens drunken argument
with her boyfriend Jordan:
"You Fucking listen to me Jordan! Shut the fuck up and fucking
listen to me Jordan. Fucking listen to me Jordan! You know I fucking
love you andyou treat me like fucking shit and you know I'm fucking
right. I don't even know where I'm fucking at and I'm trying to fucking
talk to you and you won't even fucking listen to me. Do you fucking
hear me Jordan? Do you fucking hear me Jordan? Fucking listen to me,
godamit, will you fucking listen to me. You don't fucking care........."
This is the first minute of what wuz a 25-minute conversation, the
rest of which wuz exactly like this part. It wuz some pretty POWERFUL
stuff I wanna' tell ya', and I'm jus' glad myself and all the other
residents around here were able to share her angst. I jes' hope that
fucking Jordan, the cad, realises whut a sweetie he's
got there! Now, if ya'll excuse me, I gotta' go wee wee.
Always Use Caution over the Holidays
Date: Friday, September 3, 2004 9:26 PM
Aw'right boyz and gurlz, I doubt whether ya' recall me tellin' ya'
about the last time I barbequed. It was tha' Labor day weekend, the
year 99. Ya' know, back in that world we useta' live in before
everything changed. Prolly ya' don't remember huh?
Well, anyway, whut I didn't mention at the time wuz the fack that
I injured myself in preparation of same! Yes I did but I didn't mention
it at the time, cuz I didn't wanta' throw a pall of gloom over any
festivities ya' might be engaged in while celebratin' Labor Day. Havin'
had time to think and reflect on it, I think this story now needs
ta' be told.
Whut happened wuz; I injured my back while liftin' tha' lid on my
cooker. Aaaargh. I could barely walk ese, much less Boog-a-Loo. But,
bein' tha' cap't and all, ever mindful of my rep, I endured the excruciatin'
pain, stoically, in silence. Well cept' fer maybe a couple of dozen
peoples I may have casually mentioned it to.
The only reason I 'm sayin' anythin' 'bout it right now is in the
hope that, maybe, jus' maybe, one Other person might be spared the
agony I went through. Remember; this barbecuin' is a serious and tricky
business. And as my case illustrates, it can also obviously be dangerous
and hazardous to yer health...so...I recommend that ya' never attempt
to do this by yerself. Ideally ya' would have a Trained Perfessional
Barbecue Consultant on hand, and perhaps one other person to stand
by with a Fire Extinguisher, jus' in case ya' made some minor miscalculation
in your bricquets to lighter fluid ratios.
As a general rule of thumb, don't matter whether I'm cookin' indoors
or outdoors, I don't usually go for the extinguisher unless the flames
are at least a foot over my head. Of course, this varies from individual
to individual. Some folk panic as soon as the top of the stove goes
up in flames. These are what I refer to as "Chicken Little-types".
A friendly word of Advice; these kind of peoples don't make for good
room mates. They are continually racin' and thrashin' blindly about,
wavin' their arms wildly, and all the time shriekin' and screamin',
"We're all gonna' die! We're all gonna' die!" at the top
of their lungs.
Sheeit. This can be most annoyin' and distractin' when one is wrapped
up in the Fourth Lotus Position, lookin' to cop a little Serenity
while yer repast is grillin' or simmerin' or brewin, or, y'know, whatever.
Well anyway, after our little chat, perhaps as you are on the
grill, so to speak, you will be more MINDFUL as ya' go about
your business. Jus' remember, those fires can get out of control if
yer not careful. Believe me, I speak from experience!!
So of course Fire Awareness is important, but tha' point I'm tryin'
ta' get across here in tha' hopes that the tragedy I went thru won't
happen to anyone else is; make damned sure ya're in a good stance
before ya' attempt to lift that lid on yer grill! the capt.
P.S. I think rather than celebratin' "Labor" or "Work",
we oughta' have a "Day Off Day" where we celebrate Not Workin'!
I could get into that.
Lil bit o' trivia
Date: Tuesday, August 31, 2004 4:22 PM
Do ya' remember that song from 64 by tha' Shangri-las, "The
Leader of the Pack"...with the line, "Hey Betty, is that
Jimmy's ring you're wearing?"
Did'ja know Billy Joel was playin' piano on that? Gasp! the cap't
Date: Tuesday, August 31, 2004 4:08 PM
Hey, ya' know how I mentioned drunk drivers and peoples who talk
on their cell phones while drivin', have accidents at tha' same rate?
Whut about a person drivin' drunk and also talkin' on their phone
at tha' same time? Whew, huh! the cap't