November 05, 2010



Name those nuts!
by Jim Hightower

In a recent commentary, I noted that during the past three decades the Republican Party has been jerked from its historic position of mere conservatism ... to right-wingism ... to today's kooky crackpotism.

The media establishment, however, doesn't want us to notice this ideological devolution, so it's still referring to the current crop of corporate-funded, hate-the-government extremists as "conservatives." Trying to squeeze this bunch into that moderate concept is a worse fit than trying to dress a bull in a pink tutu. So I asked you readers to give us a more honest term for them ╤ and you promptly generated hundreds of apt monikers!

Many of your suggestions play off the Republican brand itself, including Republicons, Republicants, Repugnicans, and Replutocrats. Others went straight to the convoluted ideological twist being propounded by the right-wing Republican mutants, offering such names as Regressives, Paleocons, Destructivists, Theocans and Kleptocans.

Then there were entries based on the discombobulated distortions of the new know-nothings, including Confusionistas, Confabulists, Fearists, Naybobbers, Suppressionists, Munchkins of Mayhem, and the old Spiro Agnew phrase: Nattering Nabobs of Negativism. Less friendly were several labels referring to the fact that deep down, a bunch of this year's GOP stalwarts are shallow — a fact captured by such names as Delusionaries, AbsurdiTeaists, Ignorazzi, Moronicans, Knuckle-draggers and Jingofunditarians.

The unabashed willingness of the candidates to front for the corporate agenda also produced vivid offerings, such as Corporativists, Corpservatists, The Forked Tongues, and Scroogicans. Ooo, Scroogicans — that's even fun to say!

Good job, people. Thanks for sharing.

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